Mornings are harder than most other times. Just like how if you're ill you'll feel worse in the morning, I feel super unhappy in the mornings. I've usually had dreams in which things are how I wish they were or I've had a memory of the past, every emotional detail expounded in full. It's not nice leaving that behind.
I wake up and everything's the same. I have work to do that I don't think I'm able to do well and the future is still as uncertain as ever- I expect it is for most people. Still, I've been out of bed by at latest 10am every day. It sounds stupid-- I mean I'm not achieving anything. I still feel awful for not being very productive but at least I'm not defeated.
Huff. It's not ideal. "Little things matter", he says through gritted teeth.
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